Sep. 18th, 2010 10:43 am

Introducing the characters:

  • Swill Perverse - The target of a huge conspiracy that controls the entire world but he's so paranoid he makes it out to be more than it really is.
  • Keel Tangram - Swill's secretive boss who is playing every side.
  • Grunt - The snobby team member.
  • Smiles - The geeky team member.
  • Tonka - The dopey team member.
  • The other characters -- I couldn't come up with the funny for them so they're cut out of this parody. It's just that simple. No, actually, it's a conspiracy.
  • Dive Haggis - Swill's previous boss, who departs in the first act like this:

Swill: "Look at this crossword puzzle. If you take the first letters of the words in the first column and last column going down and you replace the E in Exec (54 down, short for CEO) with an 'X' since the word starts with an E X and people tend to abbreviate that type of word that way, it spells out 'BUUT SSEX'."

Haggis: "Did you tell anyone else about this? Anyone at all?"

Swill: "No..."

Haggis: "That's really funny. I'm going to go tell Keel about it."

Haggis walks out the door and a commuter train falls on him. Yes, in the middle of an office building.

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