Mar. 19th, 2012

I never wrote down more than the titles for these ideas, so I'll briefly describe what I can remember.

Volcker, Texas Economist Ranger



The Texas Rangers are preparing to bust drug dealers in a cabin out in the wilds. Volcker suggests legalizing drugs to increase supply so their business will not be profitable and they will stop dealing drugs on their own initiative. The rangers explain that they're trying to get rid of drugs and that would be counterproductive.

Volcker gets sent out to recon the cabin. He gets in a fight with the drug dealers, and, well, he's an 80-year-old man so he ends up tied up in a chair. The Rangers kick down the door and Volcker tells the drug dealers that they are about to become familiar with a famous economic theory: the Prisoner's Dilemma.



Ramona and Beezus and Butthead



Beavis and Butthead are on a city sidewalk. Beavis runs into traffic and cars veer around him and crash. One car runs into a gas station and causes a mushroom-cloud explosion. Police vans show up immediately and cart Beavis away, and the whole scene only lasts ten or fifteen seconds.

BEAVIS: "Don't tase my butt!" (zap) "AUGH MY BUTT!"

BUTTHEAD: "Huhuhuh that was cool."

There is a change of style and pacing as Beatrice (13yo) and Ramona (9yo little sister) enter the scene. Beatrice decides to hang out with Butthead because he's in high school and therefore must be cool. Butthead takes them back to his place and proceeds to "hey baby" both of them and run through a list of adolescent deviant behaviour tropes.

  • He gives Beatrice a beer (which is a non-alcoholic Near Beer)
  • He gives her a cigarette which he "lights" with a flashlight
  • ...etc...


Finally they get around to seeing music videos. Ramona head-bangs hard to Rob Zombie's Dragula.

BEATRICE: "I didn't know MTV played music videos."

BUTTHEAD: "They only play videos like late at night."

BEATRICE: "Late at night? What time is it?" (checks) "Oh my god it's like two o'clock! We have to get home!"

After they leave, Butthead remarks that he's totally gonna score.

The next day, Ramona innocently tells the parents about how Beatrice was up all night with a high school boy who gave her beer and cigarettes.
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